Hello incredible professionals,
As our blog focusing on co-regulation comes to a close, I find myself reflecting on how this work becomes not just something we do, but a way of being in our professional lives. Today, I want to share some thoughts on sustainable integration and resources that have nourished my own practice over the years.
Beyond Techniques: Creating Co-Regulation Cultures
What I’ve observed in my consultation work is that the most profound shifts happen not when individuals master specific techniques, but when entire environments begin to embody co-regulation principles.
I remember walking into a pre-k classroom where a teacher had been implementing co-regulation approaches for several months. What struck me wasn’t just the calm corner or the visual supports – it was the quality of interactions throughout the space. Children were using regulation language with each other. The teacher was transparent about her own regulation needs. There was a palpable sense of safety that had developed over time.
When I asked what made the biggest difference, she said something that has stayed with me: “I stopped seeing regulation as something extra I needed to fit in, and started recognizing it as the foundation everything else is built on.”
Creating Sustainable Systems
If you’re working to integrate co-regulation more deeply into your setting, here are some approaches I’ve seen create lasting change:
1. Environmental Wisdom
Consider conducting what I call a “regulation audit” of your space:
- Where do sensory experiences support or challenge regulation?
- How do transitions feel in your environment?
- Are there designated spaces for different regulatory needs?
- What visual supports make regulation visible?
One therapist transformed her practice by simply adding floor cushions, dimmer switches, and a small sensory table. “It’s not elaborate,” she told me, “but those elements communicate that this is a place where different nervous system needs are welcome.”
2. Language That Creates Culture
The words we use shape the worlds we create. Some language shifts that have created powerful changes:
- From “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happening for your nervous system?”
- From “calm down” to “let’s find our calm together”
- From “behavior issues” to “dysregulation signals”
- From “non-compliant” to “seeking safety”
3. Documentation That Reflects Values
How might our professional documentation better reflect regulation-focused practice?
- Including autonomic state observations in assessments
- Documenting co-regulation strategies alongside outcomes
- Creating goals related to regulation capacity, not just behavior change
- Noting environmental factors that impact regulation
- Sustainable Self-Practice
Perhaps most importantly, how do we sustain ourselves in this work?
An early support provider shared her practice: “I keep a ‘regulation first aid kit’ in my office with items that help me reset between sessions – a sensory brush for my arms, essential oils that ground me, a recorded 2-minute meditation. Using these isn’t self-indulgent; it’s what makes co-regulation possible all day.”
Resources That Have Shaped My Practice
These resources have deeply influenced my understanding of co-regulation:
Books Worth Reading:
- “The Whole-Brain Child” by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
Why I love it: It helped me understand what’s happening in a child’s brain during big emotions, and offered practical tools that honor that development - “Beyond Behaviors” by Mona Delahooke
Why I love it: It completely transformed how I view “challenging behaviors” – seeing them as communication rather than problems to fix - “The Way of Play” by Tina Payne Bryson, PhD
Why I love it: It highlights the importance of play and gives beautiful examples of the power of play and how it can be a path to emotional resilience and connection.
I share these not as a complete library, but as resources that have genuinely shaped my approach as a parent and to working with children and families.
Questions for Your Continuing Journey
As you carry this work forward, I invite you to reflect on:
- How has your understanding of your professional role shifted through exploring co-regulation?
- What small changes have created the most significant impacts in your setting?
- Where do you find support for your own regulation in your professional life?
- What questions are emerging as you integrate these approaches?
Next blog, we’ll explore “The Polyvagal Perspective” – a neurobiological framework that deepens our understanding of how nervous systems respond to safety and threat. This perspective adds another layer to our co-regulation approaches, helping us understand autonomic states and pathways to regulation.
I’m deeply grateful to be on this journey with such dedicated professionals. Your commitment to this work ripples out far beyond what you might see in any given day.
I’ve learned that integrating regulation-focused approaches doesn’t just benefit those we serve – it fundamentally changes our experience as professionals. When we understand behavior through this lens, compassion naturally grows, judgment diminishes, and our work becomes more sustainable. This isn’t just nice to have – it’s essential for preventing burnout in helping professions.
